First month of marriage complete…

Wedding/ Honeymoon:

All ambition and drive to be a functioning member of society was left on the altar when I married my dream woman. All I want to do is board the door and windows and never leave the house. My passion is to spend time with my wife. We return to 13 boxes in our apartment (no exaggeration). We celebrate our return home as a newly wed couple by assembling a Lion, With and the Wardrobe-sized wardrobe from IKEA. Honeymoon phase evaporates. Wife is encouraging. I am silent as I hammer nails with meat cleaver.

Hardest part about being married is not having enough time with each other. Each morning and every night before bed is a tease at more time we wish we could have together.

We begin watching a Korean drama. It is crack. We binge hard. The love life of Do Min Joon and Cheon Song Yi become very important in our daily thoughts.

Our daily thoughts. We are one person. My wife and I are one. I never want to tire of delighting in saying that.

Wife is amazing cook. As a result I am becoming skilled dishwasher. I am full-time dishwasher at Schissler residence. Clock in, eat, wash, clock out.

Mrs. Schissler literally shoves me out of bed early morning to go to gym. She is asleep when doing so. Her subconscious needs me to have abs.

Our first month of marriage was a success. I bring home a dozen roses and dozen cans of Grapefruit Lacroix. I am trained well.